our brief experience with an exchange student

 

In June I saw an add in one of my homeschooling publications seeking homes for exchange students from Japan.  As a teenager we hosted a girl from Japan and that began the period of my life where I traveled to Japan twice to live with her family. Once for a summer and then again my second year of college.  I fondly remember that experience and wanted my children to have the same chance.

Yeah, our lives were crazy busy, yeah I have a lot on my plate without adding anything else, sure I was having foot surgery the week after she was to leave.  Not a problem. I am super mommy, hear me roar!!!  Ok. so it was a pathetic roar, but a roar all the same.

I had gotten the kids all hyped up and we were super excited about her being here.  She arrived and everything was perfect, going right along with how I had envisioned it……  until I realized that the box marked “speaks little” English was an understatement and may have only included the words “hi” and “yes”.

This was a tad unsettling as I never really knew what she was thinking or if she was comfortable or needed anything.  I found myself continually worried about whether she was having a good time or not.

If you know my children you know that they are a tad overwhelming and out going.  Thus it was with our new guest.  Sariah couldn’t stay off her and T.J. was always following her around.  I got the feeling she was trying hard to be accepting but that she was also a tad overwhelmed at the hustle and bustle and crazyness that is our every day life.

She was so sweet and had brought each member of the family a present.  We really enjoyed the first evening of opening presents and finding out what they were and how to use them.

Over the weekend she started complaining about being sick and I couldn’t really understand her so I was really concerned. We called her translator who talked to her and then told us he thought it was most likely a little homesickness.

The next day we met with her group and she had a chance to talk to her teacher who later explained that yes, our house was overwhelming for her and that she was concerned with the fruit flies.  I had been battling those stupid things for about a week and a half and had finally resorted to putting all the veggies and fruits in the refrigerator and emptying the trash every night among other things.

So, she ended up moving to a backup home the next morning and all of us were sad and half my children were in tears.

I was angry, frustrated, disappointed… How could something I had envisioned going so well end up being so disappointing?  How could she turn away my family?  Were we not good enough for her?  We had chosen her among the other girls and I couldn’t help  but wonder if things would have been the same way had we picked a different girl. 

After consoling my children I spent a lot of time in prayer and I can honestly say that I felt Heavenly Father comforting me and assuring me that those negative thoughts were not reality.  I came to the knowledge that sometimes he has to step in and save us from ourselves.

I had no business trying to add something else to our lives at this time.  During the short period she was with us I was anxious and concerned.  The next morning as I ate breakfast I noticed how much stress had been erased and how much more at ease I was.  And the fruit flies?  There were less than a handful remaining.  Hope I can count this as a lesson learned.