Life as we see it.
As per my job description, today I finished the dishes and then
went in to transfer the wash loads. I remember being vaguely confused as to why the dryer door was open a tad. but my memory script told me to ignore this detail so I proceeded with the action of unloading the dryer,only to be scared senseless at the sight of a child sitting in the dryer. I swear, I haven’t screamed that loud in ages! It was one of those moments where you actually have to stop and refocus on breathing…
Every once in awhile you hear a story of trial and triumph that mends your heart and renews your faith in God and in this crazy thing we call life.
Sometimes you are even privileged to know the person and have a front row seat to the drama as it unfolds.
A little background first. When we first came to Federal Way a little over five years ago I joined a co-op for homeschoolers. At the first session I recognized one of the moms. Turns out she was a friend from high school. We weren’t really close back then, but hung out at stake activities and girls camp and such. Turns out that she had a child to match each of my older three. It was great to go places because the kids would all pair off.
When I became pregnant with T.J., Sariah started demanding a ton of attention. My friend was always there to scoop her up, give her a hug or help her with whatever project she was trying to do. She forever has a special spot in Sariah’s heart as a result. When T.J. came along and then Kaden, she would hold them and love them with such a tender grace. Everyone in my family adores her.
So, the real story begins sept of 09. She flew with a friend to have a vacation in New York. While there she and her friend were hit by a taxi and she was hurt severely. Can’t remember exactly what the injuries were, but there was something involving her pelvis and multiple surgeries and then plastic surgeries on her face. She ended up having to stay in New York for over a month because she couldn’t sit long enough to make the flight back.
She finally came home and started her new life of P.T. and dr. apts. She was amazing and never showed that she may be feeling anger or hurt. She continued to home school her four children and do everything that was called of her.
Dec. came around and she was starting to heal very well, everyone was impressed. Then her husband lost his job. This added to the stress of her accident and injury was enough to do most people in. She turned to the Lord and continued living her life with grace and strength.
Jan. and the new year arrived and her husband moved out and informed her that he had been having an affair and didn’t want to be married anymore. He was moving in with the other woman. Three heart wrenching, life changing events, in almost as many months. How she woke up every day and showed the world a smile is beyond me.
This new change meant that she was single for the first time in 15 years, had to go back to work for the first time since marriage, and had to put her children back in school, three of which had never been in public school before.
I can not even begin to express how much I admired her as I cried for her, screamed for her, felt anger at her ex, pleaded with the Lord to please stay near her and bring her comfort. Through it all, there was very little I could do for her besides listen. I felt so helpless. I would complain about Matt and with tenderness and a hand on the shoulder she would remind me that I had a good spouse, while others didn’t. I would complain about home schooling and she would remind me what an amazing blessing it was that I had the opportunity to make that choice. How could she be such a comfort to me in this time? That is just who she is.
This past Jan. she met an amazing man and they were married in March. It brings such joy to my heart to see her finally enjoy happiness. To have a spouse that she knows she will have through eternity. While life is still crazy for her and challenging with all the dynamics that come with blended families, she is still a pillar of strength and grace. I admire her, I love her, I am so very happy for her!
In her first life I had Lori all to myself, selfishly speaking. Her spouse was not around a lot, so there was always plenty of time for play dates and girl time. Now that she is happily married we don’t see her as much and girl time includes the guys most often. I would gladly trade it for double dates and dancing though.
I still tear up when I recall the events of the past two years that have engulfed her, caused her to grow, and strengthened her. She is a dear friend whom I cherish and will always look up to. She is a reminder that the Lord is always mindful of us and that his plans are better for us than our own.
When I taught school, in order to help the children memorize their 3 times tables I use to play this song by School house rock. But truly, three is a magic number. It’s the entrance of them truly gaining their independence and self a bit. No longer are they your shadow.
It is also a tough age for Matt and I. I don’t know who coined the phrase “terrible two’s: but maybe their kid never made it to three, so they never saw how much more difficult the third year is.
We joke that t.J moves from one disaster to another. Oh, wait. Actually it’s not a joke at all… We hear “no, I don’t want to.” and “ Leave me alone!” on an hourly basis. Oh, my dear boy. I am anxiously counting the days until you are four.
but I will try to enjoy each smile and giggle, be patient through your tears and love you even when I feel like selling you.
Recently, I have fallen heads over heals in love with some products. So much so that I think about them way more often than I should. Three of them simplify my life entirely and the last one I just find luxurious and love the fact that I am supporting a small, hand made business that provides me with an awesome, all-natural product in which to indulge myself at a cheap price.
so, I just had to share with you.
First off is Happy Tots.
A friend of mine was over visiting and when the baby she was watching got fussy she simply whipped out one of these and gave it to her. I was sold at that moment.
I went on a quest to find the store that sold them and hit the jackpot at Target. If anyone knows where else they are sold please let me know.
All organic and apparently totally yummy, because baby K is really in love with this food. It comes in pouches like this with twist off top. You simply untwist the lid and give it to them and it immediately produces a happy baby, no kiddin.
Don’t worry, at home we still feed him finger food and with a spoon, lest he becomes a twenty year old who doesn’t know how to chew :). We have had no issues with him switching from sucking his food to chewing his food or eating from a spoon.
Point is, in the van, or on the go this stuff can’t be beat for convenience. No longer do I have to carry baby food, a spoon, bib and or wipes. shhh…. can you hear the angels singing?
Next on my “have to have” list is penagains Twist N Write .
I was at the Washington Homeschool Convention this past weekend and one of my missions was to find a cursive curriculum. In the last five minutes of the convention I found it! Not only was it just what I was looking for in every way, she was also selling these pencils for a measly buck when you made another purchase. Upon coming home the children were very eager to use them and immediately loved them, even my leftie.
I almost didn’t get one for T.J. as he hasn’t really showed an interest in writing, but Matt talked me into it and I am glad he did! T.J.loves it!
Pencil grip is something i have had to work on with each child, definitely a learned behavior and not a natural one.
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Third on the list is Times Tales.
I have a long time relationship with this product. Way back when, in another life time, I taught third grade. When it came to math I was frustrated because while teaching and learning the lower times tables isn’t all that hard, there are lots of tricks and tips for 1,2,3,4,and 5, teaching the upper numbers was excruciatingly painful. That is when I literally stumbled upon this product in desperation. Within a week my whole class of 32 kids knew their complete multiplication table.
Since then I have used the technique to teach each of my children, and have taught co-op classes using it. I highly recommend it for anyone, children and adults who pause longer than five seconds when solving an upper multiplication problem!
Back then i just had it on paper, which I lent out and have been drawing out the stories ever since. At the WHO convention I was excited to see the creators of Times Tales had a booth. As I was talking to them, they gave me the new edition on cd for free for being one of their first customers. Who couldn’t love a company like that?
Rounding out the list we have S.L.A.B. On our Anniversary get away in Salem we wandered into this shop and it was love at first sight and smell. Something about the look of hundreds of handmade soaps organized into wooden bins called to my heart. It wasn’t fancy with a ton of advertising, didn’t come in fancy and cool packaging( in fact they wrapped each bar in a piece of paper and put them in a paper bag), wasn’t found in a super mall. It was simple.
I love using it. The smells filling my breath and soul. They even have a shampoo bar that my husband and I adore. All natural ingredients and oils, how can this get any better?
They also have a laundry bar that i have been toying with the idea of getting. It would save me the time of making my own.
Upon leaving I asked what S.L.A.B. stands for, Simplify life and be. Yep, I am definitely in love.
While perusing a Family Fun magazine while waiting for Ser at the orthodontist, I came across this idea and fell in love with it. so cute and easy. I thought it would make a great family activity. Totally forgot that my husband is a Bah humbug (does that title apply to all holidays?) and that my kids have a pretty short attention span, so after six were done, I ended up doing the rest by myself.
I didn’t eat any, way too much sugar, but they were super cute.
Another thing I got from the magazine was too color on freshly boiled eggs with crayons while they were still hot. The wax melts right on like paint. So much easier and funner than messing with dyes and well, mess. I am kind of ticked that no one shared this tip with me twelve years ago. On a side note, I am off to subscribe to Family Fun.
I am so grateful to have good friends with a great back yard who are willing to host the Easter egg finding activities.
Kaden was super excited to figure out what egg hunts involved when the children dropped off their baskets to go play.
I didn’t get any good pictures, but Seri’s eggs all had scriptures written on them. That’s what we get for her being in seminary and memorizing all of the scripture mastery scriptures :)
The little blue seat was used once. He didn’t like it and didn’t want to be contained. Now he takes a regular bath just like the big kids and loves every minute of it.
This is almost one that you have to see to believe. When K was born he had this dark smudge on his stomach and I kept trying to wash/rub it off. As he got older it got darker and larger and became very defined into the shape of a heart. Look above his belly button. Not such a great pic, but you can see it. So dang cute! We tell him he was sent with lots of love. If you want to see it, just ask, I love showing it off :)
Yeah, baby K kind of steals the spotlight around here…
Way back when we lived in Germany, Matt would always bring home bouquets of beautiful flowers from the local markets. It was nice having flowers in the house, but there came a time when money was getting tighter and I asked him to stop getting the flowers so the money could be used else where.
So, the poor boy was confused when I mentioned I would like flowers from him when I gave birth to our third son. I didn’t get flowers… Mentioned it when I was about ready to deliver the 4th, 5th and 6th also. Didn’t get flowers. Although I did get rolls from Jimmy Macs for number 5. That was almost as good. It was disappointing though. I know he is grateful for the way I birth his children and for what I endure to bring them into our family, but in my mind, flowers would have made his appreciation visible.
Valentines day came around and he was all sorts of mysterious. Kept asking me if anything had arrived and I kept telling him “no”. This happened again the next day. finally he explained that he had ordered flowers, rather expensive ones in my view. Such a sweet thought. When all was said and done, the company charged him twice, was a week and a half late with delivery and then delivered something that looked no way near what the picture showed it as being. This, my friends is a $30.00 bouquet…. Sweet thought but not a good experience.
Mother’s day I awoke to breakfast and this,
Now, these are flowers! Just like the ones we use to get in Germany. I love these kinds of flowers. So vibrant and colorful and unique. Kind of like me, right? And so much cheaper besides.
Think if I have another he will bring me flowers?
I have a problem with “Service”. Not your usual problem, but one that grates on my nerves most of the time when I hear people referring to “doing service”.
This probably wont surprise most but I am going to tell it like I see it and it may not be an opinion that most agree with.
Seems like these days when people discuss service it is accompanied by the terms “hours” or “points”. Meaning they seem to talk about it only in reference to putting a tangible value on it in hopes of attaining something. Our society has tried to encourage our youth to perform service by making it a part of their curriculum or by offering awards and honors for how many hours of service you are to perform. Even the childrens sunday school sends home papers for them to document their “service hours”. The problem is that when service is taught with a reward once the reward is gone, so too are the acts of service if they were rendered in the spirit of earning the award. There is no longer any prize at the end because the children have not learned that the service rendered is the prize and no other prize should be given or expected.
Matt and I have tried to raise our children with service as an every day part of their lives. From serving each other and their parents, to serving others in organized and un-organized opportunities. We don’t count acts of service or hours of service performed. It is so ingratiated in their lives that to sit and document it would be difficult. Then you get in to defining service. For some awards only certain acts of service count. For example one award Seri had the opportunity to earn a few years ago said that babysitting your siblings wasn’t service it was your job. Are you kidding me? She didn’t decide to have these children, her parents did. So when she offers or accepts to watch them without pay, that is indeed offering a huge service to me and her father.
Most times my children and I shy away from these awards, but sometimes you just can’t. Our society doesn’t recognize service as a part of daily life, they want it documented. For church and scholarships, no matter how much it bothers me, I find I have to document service for the childrens sake. And oh, how this bothers me…..
One day while surfing the net, I cam across an add for Save The Children and Warm Up America. I called for Seri and we both agreed that this was a way in which we wanted to serve and would have fun doing it.
A couple of days later as we were sewing the infant hats Seri mentioned that it could count as a project for her Young Womans award which defines a service project as something you have spent at least 10 hours working on. So much for fun service, now it was a “project”. But, like I said some times you just have to do it. She set it up so that all the young women could participate, got donated yarn and needles so that no one had to purchase anything. Offered crochet and knit classes at our home for those who wanted to participate and didn’t know how. Let everyone know. She then set a goal of sending a hundred hats.
The young womans night was fun. We all sat around crocheting and teaching others how to, talking and laughing. At the end each young woman had made a hat. We received two more from one girl but that is where it ended. None of them wanted to do anymore.
We announced it in church and again provided instructions and all the supplies, made it as easy as possible for people to serve and….. out of our whole church we received 7 from two ladies.
now here is where I rant, so if you don’t want to hear you can skip the writing and look at the pictures.
So now I get to explain to my daughter that her family will help her finish the hundred. So we all get busy. Mom, Michael, Dad, Seri and Nana. We watch great movies while sewing furiously, we laugh, talk and bond over these crazy little infant hats. Tag each with a handwritten tag of love for the newborn who will receive the hat and pack them up to go. It would have been a great experience if it had never been placed in the “project” category in the first place. If it had been just us working and serving for the sake of helping those less fortunate. But now I have to face the disappointment in my daughter when she realizes that others are too busy, don’t want to, or just don’t do it because their is no tangible award for them and they don’t have to.
It is just so sad to me. Even in the church we preach service, but there are sometimes (actually, a lot of times) when I feel that is only portrayed as helping someone move or delivering meals. Both of which are service, but I think our definition narrows right about there.
Our family chooses to do a lot of work for Northwest Harvest. We always offer for others to come serve with us. We are usually taken up on our offer by other Mormon, Homeschooled families. Right there that tells me that we are in like minded and good company. Everyone else is too busy. yeah, we are all too busy to offer service unless there is a reward…. Sorry, I am getting cynical again……
Working at NH is so fun though!! It doesn’t even really feel like service. One of the times we went they bagged soup and boxed it. The next time we boxed apples and when those were done we did oats which is one of my favorite things to do. The kids have such a blast. they don’t even realize they are helping other people half the time.
Last week they were doing a huge food drive at a local business and were asking for volunteers, so of course the kids and I signed up.
Again we offered for others to join us.
With all the kids in tow we went and carried signs around the shopping area collecting monetary and canned food donations. We met some great people, including a drunk, old guy who couldn’t stop thanking Seri and telling her how wonderful she was, it was kind of awkward and funny all at the same time.
He did offer a good suggestion that I think we will take him up on. he mentioned that it was great to see the kids helping but that he was disappointed that they wouldn’t get to see the direct results of their service. He said I should take them down to the Cherry street food bank and if nothing else just park across the street and let the kids watch the people that are served by their actions. i know that food bank has a sandwich brigade we can work at, think I’ll go and sign us up now.
